How To Master In Your Emotions :- Anger | Disgust | Fear | Happiness | Sadness .... |
How To Master In Your Emotions :-
Meet Ben. Ben had very abusive parents who would often neglect him and sometimes they would even beat him.
So at the young age of nine he was placed into a family and therefore the only thing that Ben truly wanted in his life was to urge taken in bya real loving family.
In his mind this was the only way for him to be happy. And if he couldn't do this he was destined to measure a lifetime of unhappiness and depression.
Ben's family was in pretty bad shape and he had to fight for his most elementary needs like having enough food to eat every single day or having a pleasant bed to sleep in. Even wearing nice comfortable clothes.
And this environment led Ben to become very emotional and from a really early age Ben would experience the complete spectrum of emotions.
There would be moments when he would be crammed with rage when another kid was bullying him and moments of pure joy and hope when he thought a family would adopt him.
Followed by moments of deep sadness when the adoption parents would chose somebody else. His life was sort of a rollercoaster, consisting of times a grea thighs and really low lows.
And this caused Ben to becom very emotionally unstable. there have been some families who were curious about adopting Ben,
But the moment that he saw one thing that he liked a few family he would envision this amazing future with them and he would get lost in this magical fantasy of how happy he would be and the way amazing his life would end up .
And therefore the moment when he saw something that he didn't like a few family he would stray during a fantasy of what proportion he would hate them and the way he would be depressed and sad for his whole life.
He wasn't ready to think logically or rationally about the particular consequences of making a choice. And in fact , these extreme emotions would put tons of familes of once they met him and that they wouldn't want to bring such an emotional person into their family.
So little Ben went many years with no family and he would watch all of his friends get adopted, one by one,leaving him on their lonesome .
Aftera couple of years Ben began to act out and he began to get into fights with the opposite foster kids or arguing with the foster parents. But it wasn't until oneday when he came trouble with a policeman , Ben was simply crossing the road when he shouldn't have and therefore the police officer came up to him and said,
"Hey, you recognize jaywal king is illegal, right?"
And rather than just pologizing to the officer Ben began to argue with him saying how he was being overly sensitive.
Saying how he wasn't even jaywalking and the way stupid the cop was being. And within minutes things was completely blown out of proportion and Ben was very ball assaulting the officer and therefore the officer was close to arrest Ben until he acknowledged thathe lived during a family .
Fortunately the officer hada soft spot for foster kids. So he walked him back to his home and told the foster parents, "This young man is out of control. "He broke the law, then proceeded to verbally "assault me, please affect him." The foster parents sat Ben down and said, "Listen Ben, you nee dto start acting right. "
No family wants to require during a child "who is emotion all unstable and out of control. "Do you understand?"
Ben said, "Yes" then they left.
Ben's anger quickly became sadness. to unravel this the foster parents just gave Ben some boxing gloves and that they told him to hit the punching bag until he was tired and that's exactly what he did.
So one night Ben washiting the boxing bags and an older man who was a boxing trainer noticed him. He was impressed by his passion and he saw potential. therefore the trainer went up to Ben and asked,
"You're punching pretty hard kid, "have you ever properly boxed before?
" "Nope, I just hit the bags until I'm tired," Ben replied. "You want to undertake boxing someone "for real," the trainer asked?
"Sure, whatever" Ben said defensively. "Put on this headgear and hop within the ring. "I'll grab my friend to return and box you."
And within minutes Ben was boxing a true life person and when he was within the ring he was completely consumed by his emotions.
He felt anger, fear, ego all rising up and boiling inside him. then all of a sudden, he found himself running towards his opponent and he tried punching him with all of his strength,
But his opponent dodged it then Ben was hit with a fast jab to his jaw which knocked him clean on his feet and therefore the fight was over.
The trainer came over and asked if he was okay. "Yeah, I'm fine," Ben said defensively. The trainer told him that it's good to possess heart but you cannot just run at your opponent like that you simply need to be calm and calculate order to win a fight.
With tears and anger on his face Ben just ignored the trainer and he packed up is bags to travel and leave. As Ben was leaving the trainer said, "Few fighters have passion like yours, "but that temper is going to get you into trouble.
"If you would like to find out how to master your emotions "and fight properly, let me know." Ben stormed off and went home and when he got home he saw a child that had bullied him within the past named Lucas and he was eating the dinner that was alleged to be saved for him. Ben said, "Why are you eating my dinner?
" "You were gone." "So what, it had been fridge bviously was getting to eat it." "Shouldn't you be hitting some boxing bag "or something or getting arrested? "It looks like that's all you're good at lately .
" Ben became enraged by this comment so he hit the food off the table, pushed the child off the chair. And before Ben could do anything a foster parent quickly grabbed him and took him to his room and the foster parent said,
"If you ever assault another kid like that again "I will turn you over to the police myself. "Do you understand?"
Ben said, "Yes." "If you cannot learn how to regulate yourself "I'm getting to kick you out of this house. "Do you understand?
"Ben said, "Yes." and therefore the foster parent stormed out of the space . Ben laid in his room that night and he wasn't sure what to do, what to feel and he felt completely alone.
Ben had no idea how to control his emotions then he thought of the boxing trainer who was the sole person who had actually expressed interest in helping him.
"I guess I even have nothing to lose "to see what he has got to say,"Ben thought to himself. therefore the next day he went back to the gym and saw him. Ben went up to the coach and said,
" Hey, I'm sorry for storming off like that. "Do you continue to want to teach me the way to fight?" The coach smiled and said,
"Well, that depends "will you follow everything I say without question?
" "I guess." "Great, the primary and most vital thing "that i would like you to try to to is to read a book "called, The Laws of attribute "and once you're done reading that "I want you to inform me if you think that "you are more of a rider or a horse."
"A rider or a horse, what are you talking about, "I thought you were gonna teach me the way to fight?" "And that's exactly what I'm getting to do, "but first you've got to know "how to master your emotions.
"And don't bother returning to me "until you're able to talk about what's therein book "because it'll be really hard for you." Ben rolled his eyes and said, "Okay fine," then he went home.
And over subsequent few day she began to read the book then he finally got to the chapter called, The Rider and therefore the Horse.
As Ben was reading the chapter he began to feel weird which weird feeling quickly became anger the more he read. Ben thought to himself, "This stupid book "is trying to inform me who i'm .
"Telling me that I even have of these flaws. "It doesn't know what I've been through or who i'm ." And he threw the book away and he went downstairs to urge some food then he saw Lucas, the boy who had bullied him repeatedly within the past.
The boy who he had almost fought a few of days ago. And he saw him saying good bye to the foster parents because a family had decided to adopt him.
During this moment Ben was crammed with envy, jealousy and anger because Lucas was getting the thing thathe wanted most in his life. during this moment Ben realized that if he wanted to possess a true loving family he would need to change something.
He had to try to to something,but he didn't really skills to try to to this and there was just one one that actually wanted to assist . So, he decided to trust the boxing coach and he read the book. therefore the next day he went back to the gym to ascertain the coach.
"So, did you finish the book," the coach said? "Yes," Ben said. "Great, so a re you more of a horse or a rider?"
And Ben took a deep breath and said, "A horse." "Very good, does one want me to show "you the way to be more of a rider?
" "Yes," Ben said. And it had been during this moment when Ben started on the journey to master his emotions, he learned what his emotions meant,where they came from and why he was feeling them.
And thru the boxing coaches teachings he learned the way to control his rage, his sadness, his passion through learning about the mental side of boxing.
And within the next year Benh ad actually achieved what he wanted most in his life which was to urge taken in by a true family.
It clothed that the boxing coach and his wife were talking about adopting a child for the past few years. and therefore the new and improved Be nseemed like an appropriate fit.
So, you were probably wondering what the book said aboutthe horse and therefore the rider and i am getting to explain it to you immediately . the traditional Greeks had a really profound metaphor for a way emotions work within all humans and it's referred to as The Horse and therefore the Rider.
The rider is our thinking self. it is the a part of us that plans and problem solves. it'll tell you, "Hey,I want to travel that way." But, it is the horse that represents our emotional self and it provides the facility for our journey. it is a wild animal that compelling to require action.
Without a rider it'll move impulsively stupidly and oftentimes it willget us into trouble. Without the rider there's no directed movement or purpose but, without the horse there is now energy or power.
The one without the opposite is useless. In most of the people the horse dominates and therefore the rider is weak. And Ben was an extreme example of that. But in some people the rider is just too strong and it holds the reins too tightly and is afraid to let the animal enter a gallop.
The horse and therefore the rider must work together and this suggests that we consider our actions beforehand and that we bring the maximum amount thinking as possible to a situation before we make a choice .
But once we choose something we loosen the reins and that we enter action boldly and a spirit of adventure and power.
And it's often hard for us to admit that we are the horse because, so as to master our emotions we'd like to know why we feel the way we feel which may often bring up incredibly painful things from our past that we've buried deep inside our subconscious and most of the people go their whole lives without facing these demons......
Thanks for Reading ,and I'll see you soon....
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